I hate being asked that question. It’s so intrusive, as if what I did defined who I am. If you’re meeting sometime for the first time, why not say so tell me a little bit about yourself? It’s a much better start.
If you ask someone what they do, you either get a job description followed by a conversation about issues relevant to it. In any social situation, who the hell really wants to talk shop? And you’ll usually find no common ground and walk away from someone you may have had something in common with.
It’s like speed dating. Oh I’m a doctor translates to ding – ding – ding we have a winner. Sadly, if you keep digging you may discover that they’re a proctologist then what’s your next move on the social chessboard? Best not to know what a person does verses what they do in their spare time. For some reason we’re awkwardly required to know how somebody funds their lifestyle without too much interest in what that lifestyle actually is.
Like being a proctologist who loves sailing is far more interesting. You get an idea of why they’re willing to be up to their elbows in butt all week. Sailing’s expensive. I know. My father was a sailing fanatic. Though I despised it, I’d go along for the ride whenever I visited just because saying no seemed disrespectful. Lord knows he attended many of my activities like seeing a play or (worse) trolling through a museum. He also never talked shop about his line of business, which even to this day remains somewhat of a mystery to me. Imagine being the daughter of Jeffrey Epstein? My god how do you escape that one?
I don’t think you do. You’ll have a scarlet E pinned to your chest for life. But if the daughter goes speed dating and your first question is so what do you do will you ever uncover the real deal breaker … that being what her father did? If you started with tell me about your childhood or your family, it’s possible you might get a more intimate picture of who you’re dealing with. I mean Jeffrey Epstein’s daughter could be a social worker. Man are you gonna be floored someday to find out that your father-in-law died in prison thanks to debatable activity.
So as intrusive as so what do you do is, it’ll never paint the full picture of who that person really is. Even something as lame as what’s your favorite color could yield more insight.
If they say Black I’d back off. Red? Proceed with caution. Blue … ding ding ding.