I went to the bank to make a deposit. Nothing big about that. The branch is located in Montclair. Now in the scheme of snooty areas of Essex County, Montclair’s certainly not your number one player. There’s Glen Ridge, Upper Montclair, Saddle River, Essex Fells, Glen Rock. I mean, Montclair will cost ya but it’s historically had a bohemian aspect where money doesn’t figure into the town’s persona and I like that.
Except for today.
I’m leaving the bank, clicking open my BMW as a Range Rover pulls in right next to it. The guy rolls down his passenger window and says:
Him: You’re parking all wrong.
Me: Based on what?
Him: (getting out of car). I’ll show you.
Me: (Starting up car, backing out and flipping him the bird)
I’M STILL WITHIN THE LINES, ASS.
a little pitched yet still within the lines.